Author: admin

Categories
Cars

His Sister’s Car

‘Wait a second, wait a second,’ I held up a hand to slow my brother down. He took a deep breath, regaining his composure.

‘You good?’ I asked him.

‘I’m good,’ he breathed out, finding his centre. ‘I’m good.’

‘Alright,’ I nodded slowly. ‘Now what is it you wanted to tell me. It’s not about my car, is it?’ I joked, laughing.

He didn’t laugh with me.

‘Why aren’t you laughing with me?’

‘I, uh…’

‘Josh, I swear to god, if you crashed my car–’

‘The air conditioning broke,’ he said, wincing and holding his hands in front of his face.

‘What?’

‘The air conditioner,’ he repeated, cracking an eye open. ‘I think it’s broken.’

‘Broken how?’ I asked, my anger reduced to a simmer.

‘It’s not, like… cold?’

He raised his hands in confusion and I rolled my eyes.

‘I probably just need to visit a mechanic that can perform a car air conditioning regas,’ I said.

‘What?’ he frowned. ‘That’s a thing?’

‘That’s a thing,’ I nodded.

‘How often are you supposed to do that?’

‘I don’t know, like every year?’

‘Seriously?!’

‘I know right, there should be some sort of manual or something.’

‘Phew,’ he chuckled. ‘For a second there, I thought you were going to kill me.’

‘Did you scratch my car?’

‘No.’

‘Then you get to live,’ I nodded. ‘My rules are pretty simple.’

He threw his head back in mock laughter. I kept my face perfectly still, so he knew I was serious.

‘Now I just have to find a qualified mechanic local to Moorabbin to look at my car, I sighed.

‘Surely that won’t be too hard?’ Josh asked, frowning.

‘You wouldn’t think so,’ I sighed. ‘But it can be a slog. Want to come for a drive?’

‘Uh, maybe,’ he frowned, pulling out his phone.

‘Maybe?’ I asked, confused. ‘What are you looking at?’

‘The weather,’ he said like it was obvious. ‘You think I’m getting in a car with no air conditioning if it’s hot out there?’

 

Categories
Bathroom

Dad’s Bathroom Fall

I turned on the tap for the bath, perching myself on the side of the porcelain with a sigh. In some ways, I enjoyed this part of the process more than the bath itself – just sitting there, with the sound of the water, the steam beginning to caress my face. Nothing to do, nothing to take care of while I waited; just sweet, luxurious waiting.

The door burst open and I squealed like a caught mouse, jumping for the towel rack on pure instinct to try and shield my naked body from whoever was barging on my bath time.

My left foot landed on the tiles beautifully, but my right foot – wet from dangling in the water – slid out from underneath me as I slammed it down.

‘Dad, yikes, are you alright?’ my son rushed over to me as I lay on the floor, groaning.

‘Why’d you burst in for?’ I grunted at him, annoyed and in pain.

‘I needed to use the bathroom!’ he defended himself, throwing a towel over my lower half.

‘You didn’t hear the bath?’

‘What’s going on?’ another voice echoed from down the hallway.

‘Nothing!’ I yelled back.

‘Dad’s fallen over!’ my son called out to them. Within seconds, my whole extended family – sons, daughters, spouses and grandchildren – were gathered around me on the tiles.

‘I told you we needed to get him one of those bathtub cut outs for elderly people living in Sydney,’ my oldest daughter insisted.

‘He always said no!’ my youngest defended herself.

‘I’m not dead,’ I growled, unable to get up without help.

‘Brian, just let us do this for you,’ my middle son’s second wife pleaded.

‘Do what?’

‘Let us modify your bathtub for safety, please.’

‘I didn’t slip because I’m senile,’ I huffed. ‘Junior tried to frighten the life out of me!’

‘Did you see Mum?’ my son asked, eyes welling with tears.

‘That’s it!’ I threw my hands in the air and climbed to my feet, discarding the towel.

Everyone left me to my bath pretty quickly after that.

Categories
Energy

Energy Base Inbound

As Maphira and Vai, bound with zip ties, were hauled into the back of a helicopter, Maphira couldn’t help but wonder what the point of it all was. Why go through so much effort just to mess with them? She’d already been captured by the Conclave of Mechanists before, and Vai had been part of the dark group back then. Con had explained his plan, blatantly copying the Galactic King from Space Battles, but she still struggled to wrap her head around it.

She supposed that Con couldn’t possibly have known Vai would screw up the Bender test by refusing to do lots of 30KW solar system installations. Perhaps after that, he’d simply wanted to test Vai, taking the opportunity to do so. Even so, it seemed more like Con was interested in the drama than actually ruling the world.

That’s it! Maphira thought. He does just prefer the drama. He’s a bored child playing chess with himself. And that means he’s not going to let this end. He’ll give us a chance to escape so that the game can continue. When it happens, we have to strike, rather than run, destroying the board this sick game is played on.

Perhaps Vai, with all her knowledge of solar power, would be able to come up with a way to stop Con once and for all. If only she wasn’t completely paralysed, she could have brainstormed with the woman for any useful solar energy information.

Most likely, Con’s helicopter would bring them right to the Conclave’s new energy base in Carnegie. There, maybe they could do something to bring down the Conclave of Mechanists. Because the thing was, when you played chess against yourself, eventually you made a move that proved to be poorly calculated. One couldn’t possibly keep track of both sides equally.

And if Maphira’s inkling about what was about to go down was correct, Con had made his most poorly calculated move yet.

Categories
Wallpaper

Choosing a Wallpaper

This morning I went to the shops to buy some new wallpaper for my house. I had always thought wallpaper was an old person’s thing, since most of my friends simply paint their walls, and most of the wallpaper I’ve seen throughout my life had been installed in the previous century. However, I feel like wallpaper is entering a bit of a renaissance. I constantly see blogs and videos online about all the new wallpaper that is being released, and how to style it to make it work for your home. I really like the idea of putting flower wallpaper up in my living room, as there is a little nook there that I can use to create an element of interest without overpowering the rest of the design.

The only issue was that I didn’t know which wallpaper to choose, since when I arrived at the store there were so many floral options! All the botanicals you could probably think of, and so many more. I was truly overwhelmed by the choice. Luckily, a friendly shop assistant was nearby to help me out. She took me through the different options, including not just the factors related to design, but also those related to installation. She actually suggested that for my intended use, I should instead consider a wall decal. Melbourne designers love using wall decals, especially the temporary, prepasted ones. They’re the kind of things that you can stick up in one particular place on your wall rather than covering the entire wall. This definitely seems to suit my needs a lot better.

There are many different sizes of wall decals, but in the end I settled on a pink flower one, as I’m thinking it’s going to look wonderful when placed near my rose gold couch. I left the wallpaper store with my pockets a lot lighter, but a bigger smile as I imagine what my house is going to look like when I have finished my interior design.

Categories
Cars

Stranded Without Electricity

​​I took a deep, long breath of the still night air… and let it out in a primal scream.

‘Okay, it’s not that bad,’ Vanessa rolled her eyes. She was hanging out the window of my luxury car – the one that had just spluttered to a stop on the side of the highway.

‘Not that bad?’ I asked, knuckles turning white. ‘Do you have reception?’

‘My phone isn’t even charged,’ she shrugged. ‘I was enjoying the evening with you.’

I narrowed my eyes at her and she laughed.

‘Just get back in the car.’

‘No,’ I said stubbornly. ‘I need to figure out where we are first.’

‘We’re near Bentleigh,’ she said.

‘What?’

‘Bentleigh,’ she nodded. ‘Now will you hop back in?’

‘How do you know that? I thought your phone was dead.’

‘I’m psychic,’ she said, in a creepy monotone voice, widening her eyes. Her face cracked into a laugh, and she pointed over my shoulder at a sign that said “Welcome to Bentleigh”.

‘Oh,’ I frowned again. ‘Right. Do you know any expert mechanics in the Bentleigh area?’

‘Expert?’ she asked. ‘What’s wrong with a normal mechanic?’

‘For my baby?’ I asked, laying a shocked hand on her bonnet. ‘What’s wrong with you?’

‘Then no,’ she sighed. ‘No experts. Did you consider it might be electrical?’

‘Electrical?’

‘Yes.’

‘Why?’

‘Because all the lights went haywire,’ she said, miming the lights going haywire.

‘Great,’ I sighed, leaning against the front of the car and suppressing the urge to kick a tyre. ‘Where are we gonna find an auto electrical mechanic operating in Bentleigh at this time of night?’

‘It’s only just past seven,’ she checked her watch. ‘Why don’t you make some calls?’

‘No reception,’ I reminded her, annoyed. ‘We’re back at square one!’

‘You know,’ she said icily, ‘I’m not the one who wanted to take the scenic route.’

‘So this is my fault?!’

‘Oh good, you picked up on that!’ she shot back.

Categories
Buyer's Advocate

Buyer’s Agent Appointment

It’s early in the morning and I’m awake, ready to take on the day. Like, I definitely still feel tired and wish that I could have gone back to sleep, but my excitement for the day has given me enough energy to get out of bed and push through my heavy eyes. It’s a good feeling to wake up on a Monday morning and actually feel ready to take on the world. Stuff like that doesn’t happen to me often, so when it does I like to make the most of it. 

Why am I so excited? I’m sure you’re wondering! I’m excited because today is the day that I get to visit the highest-rated buyer’s advocate Sandringham has to offer. I’ve had an appointment with this buyer’s advocate scheduled for the last three weeks, and every morning I’ve woken up and run straight to the calendar to cross off being one day closer to my appointment. Waking up this morning truly felt like Christmas. I am so excited!

I can’t wait to walk into the office of the buyer’s advocate and tell them everything that I want from a property/home. It’s hard for me to not just run there right now. I’m seriously fighting the urge to go and sit out the front of the buyer’s advocate’s office and stare in through the window until they’re ready to see me. I don’t want to weird them out though so I’m just going to wait until an appropriate time to go to the buyer’s advocate office local to Melbourne. I’ll get the train there instead of driving so that it takes me longer to arrive – this way I can leave now and feel like I’m on my way (because I am) but will get there in double the time. I’m sure for a lot of people that may seem counterproductive, but when you want to get somewhere really badly but can’t be too early, it’s actually productive.

Categories
Renovations

The Design Process

I’m pleased to say that the kitchen design is well underway. We’re a month into the twelve-month schedule, which means there’s just one more month of planning to go until we can knock down my kitchen and complete a full-scale kitchen replacement. For many people, the prospect of this would be daunting. If the money didn’t throw them off, they’d certainly be thrown off by the fact that I have tradespeople, renovators, designers and builders at my home twenty-four seven for two to three months a year. That’s a long time to have people in your space. I personally love it, but I definitely understand how/why people wouldn’t. They’re just not as into kitchen design as I am. I doubt anyone could be, really.

I truly love kitchen renovations. I love forgetting about everything else in my life and just completely throwing myself into a renovation. It’s the perfect distraction from everything – the good, the bad and the ugly. It doesn’t matter what’s going on in my life, I can escape it. But that’s not what this blog post is about. It’s about how the kitchen design is going!

Based on the concept we’ve come up with so far, I think it’s safe to say that once this renovation is done, I will have the best kitchen design in Melbourne. The design will be featured in magazines across Australia and will be spoken about for the years to come. I might not even want to renovate a new kitchen this time next year. Maybe for the first time since I’ve had the funds to pay for a kitchen renovation every year, I will actively choose not to change it.

I can’t wait to see what my new kitchen looks like in the next couple of months. It would be incredible to be able to do some sort of big reveal with a few magazine journalists there as well. 

Categories
Gardens

A Beautiful Garden

My friend has the most beautiful garden. I don’t know how she keeps it so perfectly maintained. On top of having a full time job, she somehow manages to spend time in her garden every day, keep all her flowers perfectly watered and pruned and ensure that they’re doing the absolute best they can be. I mean, you should see all the hybrid tea rose varieties she has in her garden! And somehow they’re all absolutely thriving. I’m simultaneously so impressed with her and in awe of the fact that she is able to achieve so much. Why can’t I achieve as much as she can? Anyway, I know it’s not a competition. I truly am happy for my friend that she is doing so well for herself. I just wish I had my own hobby that I was so passionate about that I would spend hours of my free time working on it. I just haven’t found my passion yet, I guess. 

For her birthday I’m going to buy her a rose plant variety that she doesn’t have in her garden yet. It’s so easy to buy her presents because she makes it very clear what she wants. There’s no beating around the bush (ha, get it) with her because she has made her love of flowers, and roses in particular, so clear.

It’s a lot easier to buy Sarah a present than it is to buy Sally one. Sally, my other best friend, hates telling people what she wants because she doesn’t want to seem materialistic or like she is expecting a present. The thing is though, we buy each other presents every year so she’s most certainly expecting a present. She could just make it easy for me and tell me exactly what she wants, or at the very least, have a hobby as clear as Sarah’s that I can easily buy for.

 

Categories
Optometrist

An Optometrist Dream

I tumbled through the clouds, heart racing, the moon shrinking further and further away, the ground getting closer and closer, until–

I stopped. In mid-air, hovering just above the clouds.

Was I… flying?

I took an experimental dive, scraping the clouds with my hand, feeling the cotton-candy texture stick to my hand. I laughed, licking the sugar off my fingers, shooting upwards at the speed of sou—

Oh, this is a dream, isn’t it?

Yeah, this is definitely a dream.

I sighed, still hovering, waiting for this realisation to kick me out of my dreamscape and put me back in my bed. After a few moments… it didn’t happen.

I was still flying.

My brain raced with the possibilities – a dream I could control! A dream where I was in charge of what happened to me, what moments from my past I could relive!

I concentrated, harder than I ever have before, trying to bring up something joyous.

When I opened my eyes, I was waiting for an eye test at my local Brighton optometrist.

‘Dammit,’ I huffed.

‘What’s the matter?’ the optometrist asked, positioning the strap for my chin. I dutifully placed my head on it, with a sigh.

‘This just isn’t where I expected to end up tonight, that’s all.’

‘Oh?’ he laughed. ‘And what were your plans today Timmy?’

Timmy? Nobody had called me Timmy since I was a—

Uh-oh.

I looked at the man across from me more closely, and my palms went cold: he was a paediatric optometrist.

And I was a little kid again.

‘Noooooo!’ I screwed up my fists and swung my feet in the air, not even bothering to fight my irresistible urge to tantrum.

‘Timmy!’ my mother chastised me from a chair against the wall. ‘Behave yourself!’

‘I wanna wake up now!’ I whined, tears forming at the corners of my eyes.

‘If you’re good, I’ll give you a lollipop,’ the optometrist soothed. ‘Does that sound like it’d be good?’

Categories
Cars

Mechanics in Pursuit

‘Do you even know how to drive this thing?’ I hollered at Savii, as she skidded us around a corner and through an alleyway. Her only reply was to grin.

A man in a battered trench coat saw us coming and panicked, dropping his can as he jumped out of our way, hurling obscenities as we disappeared at breakneck speed.

‘Did you even see him?’ I asked, clinging to the door with a white-knuckled ferocity.

‘He moved,’ Savii rolled her eyes. ‘They always move.’

She checked her mirrors again and saw the distant dancing of red and blue lights.

‘Damn,’ she hissed. ‘Thought we would have lost them in that alley.’

‘They’re probably just following the screaming sounds,’ I protested, thrown back into my seat by another burst of acceleration.

‘Do you know of any affordable mechanics near Toowoomba?’ Savii asked, casually.

‘What does that mean?’ I glared at her.

‘Nothing, nothing,’ she said, swerving to avoid a bike messenger and clipping off the wing mirror on my side. I glared at her.

‘That was an honest mistake,’ she protested. ‘Could have happened to anyone.’

‘That’s it!’ I yelled. ‘Pull over! This ends now!’

‘Uh, about that,’ Savii checked for the police again. ‘I’m gonna need this car for a little while.’

‘How long?’

‘Until we’re clear of the City.’

‘That could take days!’

‘A week, tops,’ she batted away my complaint.

‘Wait a second,’ I frowned. ‘Until we’re clear of the city?’

‘You didn’t think I was gonna leave you behind, did you?’

‘I hoped!’

Another swerve temporarily derailed the conversation.

‘What’s the matter?’ Savii asked, genuinely confused. ‘Is your car due for a tyre fitting soon or something?’

‘No, you maniac, I don’t want to be kidnapped by you!’

‘Pffft, it’s hardly a kidnapping,’ she rolled her eyes. ‘You got in the car willingly.’

‘Because I thought you were going to drive to my place and drop me off, not get caught up in a high-speed pursuit!’

Savii shook her head with a sigh.

‘Honestly, some people just will not be reasoned with.’